He scores!

Decapitation, what a crude, barbaric method of execution. Fortunately it went out with the Medieval period, but the news travels slow in the Middle East. That's why they don't believe in the holocaust, they are just learning of the crusades! Dutch politician Geert Wilders has recently been condemned as an enemy of Islam by a Muslim Cleric. His punishment will be a 365 degree Colombian necktie. A beheading might be a little extreme, but beating your wife, mutilating your young daughters genitals, stoning adulterers, amputating limbs of thieves, and forcing women to cover themselves so only their eyes can be seen might also be a little extreme for a religion of love. Yes I know not all Muslims support beheading infidels, but draw a blasphemous picture of Mohammed and see how many of them will rally around you for support. My guess is they'll kick your head around like a soccer ball. (Sports announcer) It's good! He scores! Iran wins the W.H.K.C. (World head kicking championship), and the crowd goes wild!

http://www.earthtimes.org/articles/news/342606,wilders-beheading-summary.html

Playing doctor

Sundsvall hospital in Sweden had a patient in the emergency room who waited so long to see a doctor he took a needle and thread and sewed up a large cut he had on his leg himself. He was reported for using hospital equipment without authorization, and was arrested. I guess he was supposed to sit there and bleed to death while waiting for a doctor to tend to him. At the same hospital pregnant women have the honor of cleaning the bed after they give birth. When they say that socialized medicine really gets you involved in your medical care they weren't kidding. After you play doctor, you get to play nurse.

http://www.thelocal.se/28150/20100803/
http://www.news.com.au/breaking-news/mum-asked-to-clean-hospital-room-after-birth/story-e6frfku0-1225908612738

Constitutional wrongs

Everyone knows we have rights. Even the dumbest criminals know they have the right to remain silent, although they must have terrible memories because even after 25 arrests we still have to repeat them. President Obama reminded us of the right of freedom of religion concerning the protest over building the Ground Zero Mosque. He failed to realize we know our constitution better than he does. Currently the A.C.L.U. is suing President Obama over the policy of targeting American citizens (Al Awlaki specifically) for assassination without trial or due process. I figured the president of the Harvard Law Review would know better. Wiretaps without warrants, breaking contract law in the G.M. bankruptcy, the mandate to buy health insurance and many of the bills making their way through congress are to say the least outside the boundaries of the constitution. When honest citizens complain about Congress failing to uphold and defend the constitution, we are quickly reminded of the right to remain silent. I thought Miranda warnings were specifically for the protection of criminals, and Chicago politicians.

http://blogs.abcnews.com/politicalpunch/2010/08/aclu-sues-to-block-targeted-killings.html

Driving me crazy

Driving is one of the great American pastimes. With thousands of miles of paved highways, scenic vistas, beaches, mountains, and landscape, cruising the U.S. is the best way to travel. Unless your a commuter going to work during rush hour. In Bejing there was bumper to bumper gridlock for 60 miles that lasted for nine days! Imagine calling your boss and saying I'll be a week late I am stuck in bad traffic. That's almost as bad as having the same relative die year after year so you can go to the super bowl.

http://articles.latimes.com/2010/aug/25/world/la-fg-china-traffic-20100825

Forced Malpractice

Everyday people contact attorney's to file a lawsuit against a doctor or hospital. Got an infection ask for 100k, the surgeon left behind a sponge ask for 200k, and if his negligence caused you to become a quadriplegic ask for 50 mill. That is unless you live in Saudi Arabia. A judge there has ordered that a criminal have his spine cut as punishment for beating a man and paralyzing him. The so called "eye for an eye" code of the Koran. Doctors are declining to do so for ethical reasons, and it will be interesting to see if the clerics will prevail in their enforcement of Sharia law. If this is what they do to their own people I wonder what they will do to their spineless enemies?

http://canadafreepress.com/index.php/article/26756

Drunken Baboons

While most drunks act like animals, some animals are starting to act like drunks. Capetown South Africa has become a big player in the wine industry, and the local baboons are becoming very addicted to the fermented grapes. While I prefer red wine they prefer Sauvignon Blanc, a very good choice with their mostly vegetarian diets. Unfortunately they become very aggressive when drunk, kind of like the the punks in your neighborhood bar. They break into homes, steal food, and even surrounded a child and pelted him with fruit. Some get so drunk they pass out and don't make it home. I guess no one offered them cab fare. Recently the stimulus plan sponsored a program testing cocaine on monkey's. Along with their current problems of alcoholism, rehab centers are going to turn into a real zoo. At least Paris Hilton, and Lindsey Lohan will be in good company.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/southafrica/7969313/Drunk-baboons-plague-Cape-Towns-exclusive-suburbs.html

Pepto Abysmal

The T.S.A. has some splaining to do. Al Soofi from Yemen was allowed to board a flight in Chicago even though he generated security concerns. In his luggage was a cellphone wired to a pepto bismol bottle. Maybe all those annoying telemarketing calls gave him indigestion, but more than likely it was a test to see if a remote detonating device would be picked up by security. Apparently it wasn't considered to be a bomb, although it wasn't sent to a lab for testing. He was allowed to continue flying with his luggage, but later was arrested on his way to Dubai. The last two terrorist attempts were foiled not by well equipped, well funded, well trained security agents, but by inept, inexperienced clowns with explosive underwear and a barbecue grill in their S.U.V. Now we got a guy testing us to see if we can detect a bomb in his luggage, and the T.S.A. just figures he got gas or something. What an abysmal record for Homeland Security. Janet Napolitano should be sucking down a case of pepto right about now.
http://hotair.com/archives/2010/08/30/breaking-two-men-arrested-in-amsterdam-on-terror-charges-after-boarding-flight-in-chicago/