Gorilla Warfare

A story originating in China has claimed that Jihadists are training monkeys to fight the war in Afghanistan. While it may seem patently absurd it is not the first time animals have been used in warfare. Military officers have used pigeons to deliver messages on the battlefield. War elephants were used as primitive weapons of mass destruction, and as recently as the 1990's dolphins were used to detect mines in the first gulf war after being fitted with cameras. Monkeys are very smart and with an unlimited supply of bananas you could probably teach them anything. A Rhesus monkey named Albert was the first astronaut in space in 1949. You may also remember Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp the highly decorated American spy. There were also the persistent rumors that "Bubbles", Michael Jackson's pet monkey was an undercover C.I.A. agent who was fired for sexual misconduct, due to his appearance in a porno movie entitled "The Spy who jungle loved me". While the Chinese have been known for passing notoriously bad intel, maybe we have been misspelling guerrilla warfare all along.